Life After Layoffs

This is all new to me.

Sure, I was fired from a student IT job when I was in college. I went back to my dorm room, grabbed a beer, and 45 minutes later my phone rang. It was someone in Student Activities who knew me from my then-former role, and would I be interested in coming to work for that person in their new department?

I was unemployed for all of 90 minutes; it would have been fewer but I finished my beer before going to the student union to sign the paperwork.

That was in 1999. For the next 23 years, I was never unemployed.

That changed 72 hours before I wrote this line.

I don’t mean for people to think that I didn’t come close a few times over the years. I worked at places where I knew roles were about to be eliminated, where mergers would impact my role, and where culture changes left me as a poor fit. However, in every instance I managed to gracefully exit before things devolved to the point of layoffs.

I left a comfortable but routine corporate job in 2021 to join a small, innovative company in a field that I was passionate about working in and supporting. I knew when I made the move that part of the trade involved a loss of the safety net you have in a massive corporation, and unfortunately I lost the bet, so to speak. A couple of tough quarterly revenue results and I found my 1:1 meeting included an extra guest in the form of human resources.

I can safely say it wasn’t a performance decision, and I was told such. I knew that even after 13 months, I was still the new guy.

None of that stops the feelings of fear and disappointment.

I’ll be honest; I’m not an expert on organizational psychology, and I don’t have a background in HR. I’m a technical architect, someone who has had hire and fire authority in the past, and a person who spends much of his professional life in front of customers in stressful situations. My opinions are worth exactly what you’ve paid for them, but they are at least the opinions of someone who has been there and done that. I’ll share the lessons I’ve learned in not only the last 72 hours, but the past 23 years, and my opinions of how to move forward after you are officially unemployed.

Let’s start with how to handle the actual meeting. This is tough, because in modern times it is just as (if not even more) likely to be a video call as it is a face-to-face meeting.

If you’re lucky, it won’t entirely be a shock. I wasn’t quite so fortunate, but trust me, if you’ve been told in a last-minute company meeting that layoffs are coming and two hours later you find HR in your monthly call with your boss, you are about to have a bad day.

Hopefully your about-to-be-former employer is professional, and by that I mean civil, calm, and to the point. I personally didn’t want to hear platitudes, I knew what was happening and just wanted the pertinent information about what to expect.

Realize that at this point, the decision has already been made. Pleading or trying to negotiate isn’t going to help you, and may just escalate the emotion of the situation.

Be aware that you may not have top-shelf cognitive abilities in the heat of the moment. Your heart rate is likely elevated, your blood pressure may skyrocket, and adrenaline is probably going to do all that and more to your body.

If you feel that your memory isn’t sharp, take copious notes and ask people to repeat details if need be. Make sure you understand details if you are offered a severance package, insurance coverage, etc. Confirm that you will be sent an email and paperwork (either real or virtual) with every detail put into writing.

If you are having the meeting in person, they may have the paperwork there for you to sign. I’d encourage you to ask if it needs to be done at that moment because you should have the right to review the details with an attorney. Regardless, I would at least suggest reviewing the written documents away from the stress of the meeting before you sign them.

In short, be civil. Listen carefully. If you still feel the need to rage, do so privately after hanging up or leaving.

Take a deep breath. You are more than your job.

As I said, I’m not a HR expert, and there are other articles written on steps to take related to unemployment benefits, health insurance continuation, and all those tactical details. I won’t attempt to cover those here.

What I CAN give you right now is empathy.

It’s ok to be angry. It’s ok to be sad. It’s ok to be scared.

You can yell, scream, cry, laugh, or whatever else your emotions lead you to do. You don’t need to be professional in the confines of your car or your home. It is ok to be human and react to the situation.

Do not, do not , DO NOT disparage your former employer, no matter how tempting it may be to do so. If you have a severance package coming, it’s likely that you have agreed to not speak ill of them (and hopefully them of you), but even more importantly, it’s just not a professional response. You can be angry and rant to yourself and your family all you’d like. That’s normal, but please do your career a favor and avoid social media until you have your emotions under control.

Remember, you are more than your job.

Your next tactical steps may depend on your financial situation.

If you need immediate income, see my note above about unemployment and look for those resources (usually at the state level).

If you can afford to take a little time off, do so. Think about what you want to do with your career.

It’s tempting to take a role that mirrors the one you just lost. That’s ok, it’s perfectly acceptable. But this is also an opportunity to make a change if you wish.

Consider your next steps, and what you need in order to take them. If you need a certification, this is a great time to study and take the test. If you need additional skills, this is a chance to take a class without being interrupted by your day job.

And if you just need a break, it’s ok to take that too.

When you are calm and ready, reach out to those in your industry that you trust. Be honest about your situation and what you are looking for in terms of next steps. Use them as a sounding board if you are thinking of making a change in your path. They may suggest resources that you haven’t considered, or know someone who has taken a similar route. ALWAYS be grateful for help. They are taking time from their lives to listen to you and with any luck, provide advice or even a connection. Gratitude never goes out of style.

Do not pressure others to cough up introductions or recommendations. If they are willing to help you, they’ll offer. If they don’t offer, don’t take it personally. You don’t know their situation; they may have recommended someone in the past and had it backfire, they may not know your work or reputation well enough to feel comfortable attaching their name to yours, or they may not know of anything that’s a good fit right now. Regardless, thank them for listening no matter if you receive anything.

It’s ok to not know if you are a 100% fit for a role and company, and just as importantly, if a role and company is a 100% fit for YOU. That’s what conversations are for, after all.

Remember, there IS a 100% rule that always applies:

You’ll miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.